I graduate from college in 6 weeks.
Needless to say, there’s a lot of unknown coming my way, and I’m not handling it too well. You see, I have this trust issue. I trust the Lord too much. As long as I don’t have to make a decision, I can trust God all day long to provide for me and do what’s best for me and allow me to do His will. But when it comes to making a decision, I crumble. I second guess. I double think. I am wrecked. What if I make the wrong one? My decision gives me the option to fail, and I fear failure.
Of course I tell God these things. I ask for wisdom and discernment. I beg him to just do it for me. Please God, close the doors I don’t need to walk through and open the ones I do. Just guide my heart, God. Guide my passion. I’m so weak. I’m such a coward. For some reason I can’t shake the responsibility I feel. I can’t trust that He’ll provide for me even when I make the wrong decision, and I’m fearful that my sinfulness will prevent me from being all He wants me to be.
Tonight I talked to a missionary from a country near Russia who was visiting his family for a couple of weeks. He was called on during the youth service to speak on his thoughts of the differences in the Christians in America and the ones in his country. He talked about how his American friends were going through some drama (even though seemingly less significant than the persecution he faces daily living in a country where it is illegal to be a Christian, but still very important), and that one thing he noticed was that most Christians aren’t turning to Christ for help.
He said, “The question is, IS JESUS ALIVE OR DEAD? Because if he’s alive, then we talk to him and discuss things with him and expect help and an answer.”
In his country they have NO other choice, but to ask and receive from God. Even the small things come straight from the Provider, because there is no other option. How often do we escape to movies, empty sayings, other people, or even our own imperfect mind to try to figure things out? Jesus tells us to come to Him and that He will provide for us, and that if we ask we will receive. He promises that to us!
So in the middle of all the chaos, confusion, and uncertainty about the future, I urge you, along with me, to ask and believe, and we WILL receive. We will receive the answers we need. We will receive the money we don’t have. We will receive the direction to pick a career. We will receive the love that He so generously gives us. Because Jesus is dead in a tomb with no power? No, because Jesus is ALIVE! And he has power to do immeasurably more than we could ever ask or imagine.